Back in 2001, I was just a week study abroad living in London. I've written about my time there before but one particular thing I learned while actually studying (yes, I did attend classes and do school work) was that the internet is full of amazing, wonderful things that will make you pidoodle your pants.
While hanging in the computer lab one night, (I believe a handful of us were working on our papers about the Black Plague for our History of London class) one of my friends, I'll call her B-Girl for all blogging purposes because she is from Bristol, CT and she likes the hip hop, asked me if I'd ever seen the mullet boy.
Now at this time, we were all obsessed with mullets and mullet culture and made a Where's Waldo tupe game out of spotting them all over the place in Europe. I had not seen the mullet boy on the internet. Cue a quick Google search and she introduced me to Michael Blount, the mullet boy and creator of the "Hello My Future Girlfriend" web site. It has since been taken down, but mirrors of it are still all over the web. You can see one here.
As you can see, it is both hilarious and haunting. We were left wanting to know more about this young mullet boy who lives in New Mexico. His coke bottle glasses called to us in the night. His mullet visited us in dreams. We wanted to PM him on Yahoo chat.
We would recite his little speech over and over. And no, it never got old.
Flash forward to April 2009. I was bored. It was late. I wanted to find the page to send out in email to make everyone remember and pidoodle themselves again. What I found was even better.
It turns out mullet boy (AKA Michael Blount) has a new website. In his "History" section, he describes the aftermath of creating the page and how he was basically harrassed for years to come. Sad but true. He also links to his MySpace page which for all purposes seems really normal. He still lives in New Mexico and now he's a grown man.
Like most people, I was wondering if little Mikey mullet had ever found his "future girlfriend" and if she did indeed, like what he sounded like. The answer is no.
Because my friends, all along, Mikey the mullet boy was really looking for his future boyfriend. That's right. According to his MySpace, the kid is into dudes. The line that made him famous is a lie. And a huge lie packed with irony.
I love the internet.