Monday, October 31, 2005

It's official....

Heath is now a baby daddy. Michelle Williams and he are now parents of a baby girl named......Matilda. I wonder if she has magic powers. Anyway, I think I can handle a man with a baby. Britney did it. And look at her...

oh well, guess he's gone forever.

Monday, October 17, 2005


Thanks to everyone who made my birthday a special event! I had a great time and appreciate all the well wishes! Be proud, I'm growing up and I didn't do anything too stupid!

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Special Pre-OLD edition

Yes I know. I haven't posted in forever but I deserve the slack because I've been too damn busy with school.

Now as for the title of this post, I am turning 24 in a week. Yes, 24. Like the Keifer Sutherland mid-season goto on Fox. 24, just sounds old. It will be a coming of age year for me. No more student loans to pay my rent. No more excuses to be unemployed. No more excuses for eating Lucky Charms (although I think I am crafty enough to find some).

But, as a true fabulous New Yorker. I will celebrate. Celebrate I will among a bar full anonymous 20-somethings. Want to come? Be at Crime Scene (really the name of the place) on Bowery on Saturday night. I'll be the drunk girl.

Now, back to business:

1. The boy...umm I think I need Heidi Klum to help me with this one. I tried. I really did. But I just can't be with someone just to be with someone. See, I really am a grown up. But I also don't want to hurt his feelings. Maybe I'll keep trying to feel something, anything. Which will still be fruitless because my heart is so obviously with someone else (DAMN YOU HEATH LEDGER! j/k).

2. Lost. Yes I love the show. But like Katie Holmes (more on my friend "Kate" later) I hate it too. I need more info. I just don't get where this plot is going. I'm more lost than an acid-tripping hippie watching Labyrinth on HDTV. Or maybe that's JJ Abrams genius. To make me feel like a hippie...DAMN YOU!

3. Family Guy If you haven't seen the Stewie movie buy it now. I mean NOW. If you are lucky like me you will see Whoopi Goldberg in Best Buy when you go to get it. It is the funniest thing I have seen in a while sans Tom Cruise's efforts to look heterosexual.

4. TomKat I have openly supported the theory that Katie Holmes has been brainwashed by creepy scientologists. And now...she's preggers. But like, fake preggers. She was skinny a week ago and now she's like full second trimester. I swear it's like an episode of some sci-fi show I watched once where a baby came to full term in like a day. My new theory: Chris Klein or some other C-lister knocked her up and she made a deal with devil (played here by Mr. Cruise) to get some A-lister fame out of it.

5. Kathy Griffin's divorce SO SAD!

6. SNL Their new tagline should be "Still sucking after a jillion years!"