Sunday, August 28, 2005

You should have...

stayed in that closet R. Kelly.

Against my better judgment I turned on the MTV awards tonight. What the hell is wrong with R. Kelly. I kind of let go the fact that he beds teenagers and chalked it up to the groupie factor. But his poor lip-synching performance tonight was more ridiculous than John Norris's outfit.

Like did he think we wouldn't catch onto the fact that he stopped moving his mouth while the audio track boomed over the microphone. I don't care who Cathy, Chuck and Rufus are R. And Chuck and Rufus are "on the down low" while Cathy goes clubbing telling people her name is Mary and sleeping with gangsters with guns (that would be you R, if you got confused in your wildly elaborate story line of your epic R&B saga). And why did Rufus break up with Chuck? It seems that Mary/Cathy is a dirty homophobic whore with issues. Chuck seemed nice. I like Chuck.

Anyway R., you should have stayed in that closet. Because I think all of America thought, in the wise words of Valerie Cherish, "I don't want to see that!"


Anonymous said...

Excuse you. John Norris is better than you kthx.

Mjones said...


In no way am I judging John Norris's journalistic integrity or his wonderful career with Viacom and MTV. I am sure he is a wonderful man and as you say "is better than" me. (Which by the way is a very broad statement. Do you mean a better person, like he gives to charities and stuff? Or a better reporter? Or a better lover? Some calrification could help here.)

However, I must question his fashion sense. Did you see the awards that night? No one should where that much purple. Ever.